I really hate this. Why is it so hard for me to find anyone to watch World Cup with me?!? I seriously am hanging out with the wrong people here. FUCKING FRIENDS.
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Saturday, March 29, 2014
My fear finally materialised. I wasn't expecting it to be this fast.
Someone's getting that opportunity. I want that, so badly.
My wings are clipped, forever.
I'll always live with this regret. It hurts me. It kills me.
I can't rationalise this and I'm trying, very hard. Why couldn't I have it forever?
Why create a wild soul only to be restrained by these forces, who feed on feelings and guilt.
Why? Cos' this is life?
Damn right. This is my life. Others have it good and I'm stuck, forever and ever, till the day I die.
Someone's getting that opportunity. I want that, so badly.
My wings are clipped, forever.
I'll always live with this regret. It hurts me. It kills me.
I can't rationalise this and I'm trying, very hard. Why couldn't I have it forever?
Why create a wild soul only to be restrained by these forces, who feed on feelings and guilt.
Why? Cos' this is life?
Damn right. This is my life. Others have it good and I'm stuck, forever and ever, till the day I die.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
I have said hurtful and hateful (even shameful) things on this blog but you know what, sometimes you need an outlet for this kinda nasty stuff to achieve sanity and balance in life. Ok I'm writing this cos' I'm feeling a lil guilty for writing that about my dad. Oops! :P Anyway, he's just being a typical man and mum's just being a typical traditional woman. I don't take shit like that, not from anyone. Really, men, they seem perfect and godly at first, then they turn into disgusting monsters. Perhaps someone will prove me wrong some day but I'm not counting on it. Everlasting love is bullshit.
In any case someone reads this ever, I love my parents and I don't hate men but a woman can bitch however, whenever, and whatever she wants it. Life is good, not great so I am ALMOST always thinking of how to make it better by spending more time on what I love and not get distracted by life.
:)
Sunday, June 23, 2013
My dad's fat and lazy. He's a bad hubby. Men do not age like fine wine. Whoever said they age like fine wine was totally delusional. I am pretty convinced I do not want to grow old with a man. I can't be bothered having to take care of a partner. I am happy just by myself. On another note, kids are. . .I don't know, kinda like transient beings. I do not see their purpose. To be born into this world is to be born into suffering. Why do people have kids? No seriously, why do they?
Monday, May 27, 2013
Marriage
Ok here I am. Still clear-headed. :D
My stance still stands. No kids. No marriage. If I find someone. . .wow just realised I used 'IF' not 'WHEN'. . .ANYWAY, if I find someone, ok good and we'll see where it takes us but marriage is definitely not on my priority. I guess in a way, I am non-committal. I've said this a lot of times. Kids are risk investments. They're only cute when they're young and don't talk. I don't have patience. The world has too much suffering so why procreate? Closer to home, I am very sure I do not want to have kids. I'd prefer to keep a dog but you know what, I don't think I can commit. Dogs are for life too. Bottom line, let the misery end with me. Well, I am not entirely miserable cos' I am thankful for my parents but you know, as in every other family, life's not always rosy.
I feel sorry for mom. She puts in so much time and effort into taking care of dad and gets nothing in return but emotional abuse. It's like she simply exists to serve him. Mom's too nice, in general. As he ages and gets sick, he needs to thank his lucky stars that he's one damn fucking lucky man cos' mom will be there for him. However, at this point, I can't see how he would do the same for mom. He's done nothing for mom except provided a roof over her head. I want to say I hate him so much but I don't cos' I know he's a good dad. Yes, good. Not great. Everyone could do with some improvement. Good dad but bad husband. Yep, I think this sums up pretty well. This is one of the reasons why I'm not keen to get married. I don't want to end up like my mom. Of cos', I know things could turn out differently but anyway, marriage is far off my radar so let's fuck it for now. I don't even have a potential mate. Duh!
Everything's about my dad. His ego is so big. He's a tyrant and he has a fucking temper. I mean seriously, doesn't one mellow down as one gets old?!? Mom says he's better now but I don't see any difference. Poor mom. :( I really can't see myself putting up with such a man. All I can say is 'To hell with men age like fine wine!' Puuuuuuuiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!! Can't think of a better word to describe how I feel. Bah!
What is the point of marriage? Really, examine yours and look deeper.
By the way, I can't take snorers too. WOW SERIOUSLY, MOM I SALUTE YOU! YOU DESERVE SO MUCH MORE! :(
My stance still stands. No kids. No marriage. If I find someone. . .wow just realised I used 'IF' not 'WHEN'. . .ANYWAY, if I find someone, ok good and we'll see where it takes us but marriage is definitely not on my priority. I guess in a way, I am non-committal. I've said this a lot of times. Kids are risk investments. They're only cute when they're young and don't talk. I don't have patience. The world has too much suffering so why procreate? Closer to home, I am very sure I do not want to have kids. I'd prefer to keep a dog but you know what, I don't think I can commit. Dogs are for life too. Bottom line, let the misery end with me. Well, I am not entirely miserable cos' I am thankful for my parents but you know, as in every other family, life's not always rosy.
I feel sorry for mom. She puts in so much time and effort into taking care of dad and gets nothing in return but emotional abuse. It's like she simply exists to serve him. Mom's too nice, in general. As he ages and gets sick, he needs to thank his lucky stars that he's one damn fucking lucky man cos' mom will be there for him. However, at this point, I can't see how he would do the same for mom. He's done nothing for mom except provided a roof over her head. I want to say I hate him so much but I don't cos' I know he's a good dad. Yes, good. Not great. Everyone could do with some improvement. Good dad but bad husband. Yep, I think this sums up pretty well. This is one of the reasons why I'm not keen to get married. I don't want to end up like my mom. Of cos', I know things could turn out differently but anyway, marriage is far off my radar so let's fuck it for now. I don't even have a potential mate. Duh!
Everything's about my dad. His ego is so big. He's a tyrant and he has a fucking temper. I mean seriously, doesn't one mellow down as one gets old?!? Mom says he's better now but I don't see any difference. Poor mom. :( I really can't see myself putting up with such a man. All I can say is 'To hell with men age like fine wine!' Puuuuuuuiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!! Can't think of a better word to describe how I feel. Bah!
What is the point of marriage? Really, examine yours and look deeper.
By the way, I can't take snorers too. WOW SERIOUSLY, MOM I SALUTE YOU! YOU DESERVE SO MUCH MORE! :(
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